THE GREATEST AD EVER WRITTEN

The Greatest Advertisement Ever Written.

Over the years, I’ve notice the question of “Who is the greatest advertising writer?” Or… “What was the greatest ad ever written?”

Some of the top names in copywriters are Gary Halbert, Clayton Makepeace, Brian Keith Voiles and I might include my name among them.

Why? Some twenty years ago, when I started, I wanted to be one of the top copywriters in the world. I feel I finally arrived when Denny Hatch, in writing in “Who’s Mailing What” some 10 years ago… put my name right next to Gene Schwartz and Geoff Hasler as the top three “California Hype” copywriters in America.

Denny meant it as a put-down. But I was thrilled to be cast alongside Gene Schwartz in any mention. (Who hasn’t read Schwartz’s book BREAKTHROUGH ADVERTISING… at least once and thought “Damn, I wish I was that good.” I’ve read that book at least 8 times over the years. And each time I marvel.

As to the greatest ad ever written: Posted nearby is an ad created by John Caples. It is without a doubt the greatest ad ever created. Why? Because it ran profitably for over 40 years. Most ads, sales letters, web sites, etc. have are lucky to have a one season shelf life. If they work at all.

The headline was DO YOU MAKE THESE MISTAKES IN ENGLISH?

Not only is the ad built to be charming and informative… but the MARKET WAS HUNGRY for this kind of information from the 1920’s through the 1960’s. What changed? The market changed. In the 1960’s the biggest wave of immigrants switched from being European to Mexican. The Europeans wanted to assimilate. They wanted to learn English. By the 60’s the politically correct crowd had taught us all that “multi-cultural” was the way to go. No need to become “American”… when all cultures are equal and beautiful. We changed from being a “melting pot” to “celebrating diversity”.

(Aside: Some of us have learned that you can celebrate diversity or celebrate excellence. But not both.)

There are two lessons to learn from this ad. Anyone who studies it, line by line, will discover “service”. And after all… all good “selling” is “serving”.

The ad SERVES with good information before it asks for the order.

The second lesson is a lesson on demographic shifts.

You can only sell what the crowd wants to buy. When the crowd changes, you have to change with them. Advertising cannot change desires. If the desire is not there, you will waste your money trying to create it.

But if the desire is there, a skillful copywriter can enhance and focus the desire toward a specific solution. But desire must come first.

Here are some basic human desires:

1. Aliveness
2. Autonomy
3. Beauty
4. Caring
5. Challenge
6. Compassion
7. Contribution
8. Courage
9. Creativity
10. Dignity
11. Elegance
12. Excellence
13. Excitement
14. Fairness
15. Freedom
16. Fulfillment
17. Fun
18. Grace
19. Happiness
20. Harmony
21. Helping
22. Honesty
23. Humor
24. Innovation
25. Joy
26. Justice
27. Learning
28. Love
29. Making the world a better place
30. Mastery
31. Order
32. Perseverance
33. Playfulness
34. Revolution
35. Safety
36. Security
37. Self-reliance
38. Service
39. Simplicity
40. Solving problems
41. Stimulating change
42. Synergy
43. Truth
44. Uniqueness
45. Using my abilities
46. Vitality
47. Wisdom
48. Zest
49. Peace

If we were to get down and dirty… raw… we could say the basic desires are for more TIME more SEX and MORE MONEY.

Do you make these mistakes in marketing? Do you ignore these desires? Do you just hang a sign outside your door hoping buyers will throw money at your feet?

Let’s change that.

Yours,
Linwood Austin
801-201-9026

Million Dollar Marketing Secrets Revealed

As Seen in DM NEWS:

I am so confident about my skill in marketing and advertising that…

I Guarantee to Outpull Your Best Ad…

Your Best Web Site

or Mailing Package by 10% better in a split-run test.

If I don’t pull at least 10% more responses than your control you won’t owe me one red cent for the work I have done — creative or production.
If I do beat your best ad or direct mail package or internet marketing campaign… you simply pay the agreed upon fee. Should the test results be impressive and we both wish to enter into a full-service advertising agency agreement — this creative fee will be rebated to you. In effect this offer is risk-free. You pay nothing — if I can’t beat your ad by 10% or more.

Are You Intrigued?

Please Read On…
Imagine how much a minimum of 10% increase in advertising results would mean to you in net year-end profit. Too many businesses spend more in advertising than they see in profit each year. Too many have no idea if their ads are working at all. My methods can change all that.
Are There Any Strings?
Only 2 —

1. There must be only one chef in the kitchen — Me! I will create the advertising package that I think will sell. You can correct the legal and factual items. But I must have full creative freedom. Good advertising is not created by committee. If your bookkeeper or cousin insists on rewriting the copy or changing the layout, I will not guarantee the results. Nor its success.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ll take as much input as I can get from you or your staff about your business, your product, your successes and failures. But after that, when I finally sit down to put your ad together, I do it alone.
2. I play to win! I know a good ad when I see one. And if I honestly think your ad is excellent and I won’t have a chance of beating it, I will say so. But this is not likely. I’d say that 19 out of 20 ads, web sites or direct mail packages are so bad that I could get double, maybe triple the response. Easily! Most products and services are much more exciting than their advertising lets on.

Who is Linwood Austin?

For years I have been quietly honing my skill at creating “killer” advertising. Believe me it is not an easy thing to do. There have been long hours of research into the principles of “scientific advertising.” There have been many thousands of dollars of my own and clients’ money laid down in TESTS for advertising appeal, content, offers, impact and ultimate CASH response. The results are surprising. Advertising that gets the best results is best not left up to mere opinion.

How Can I Guarantee Results?

My approach to advertising is different. I don’t set out to win advertising awards. I want to see the sales chart explode through the roof. The only ad I was ever tempted to enter into an awards contest was one with the headline…

Warning: Do Not Call Any Ad Agency Until You Read This!

This was a yellow page ad that didn’t make me popular with the local ad agencies. But it made me a ton of money. I don’t make advertising for advertising’s sake. I make advertising from within the mind and emotions of the prospective buyer. What do they really want to hear? What would make them lay aside their indifference and write you a check? What message would make them almost “lust” after your product?

Here Are 2 “Tricks” I Use To Guarantee Profitability.

1. Advertising is salesmanship. In the ads I create every little thing has to justify itself in sales. The headline, the picture, the concept, every word. No ad or direct mail package or on-line campaign is run on the hope that it will have a “cumulative” effect. Advertising is not just keeping your name out there. I demand the highest MEASURED return possible.
2. Find the hot buttons. To some degree my techniques rely on people’s psychological needs. Their need to emotionally embrace the product. Their need to logically justify the purchase to themselves and others. Their longing for the three timeless human cravings:

1.) More Time 2.) More Sex
3.) More Money

I am very careful to translate these benefits into something easily grasped by any prospect regarding your product. Please keep in mind that I am not making this offer just to be cute. I really can boost the advertising response to almost any ad. I created one ad for a professional service that did 47 times better than what the client was using previously. A seminar industry client came to me literally with holes in his shoes. I developed a marketing package for him that brought him $103,000 in 90 days.
A high-end stereo client said, “This Christmas your advertising brought us all the buyers and left our competitors with all the ‘lookers.’” A computer mail-order firm said, “Your ad beat ours 3 to 1.”
An ex-publisher said, “Because of your advertising techniques I sold my business for 4 times what I paid for it.”
A discount travel organization said, “How did you do it? Your TV spot brings so many responses it makes our old one look like the dark ages.”
Although they may not admit it, some heads of the nation’s top marketing firms call me for brainstorming and problem solving when they have a tough marketing situation.

Has My Advertising Ever Failed?

Most of the ads I create produce far greater results than anything the client ever dreamed of. The biggest problem I have is when someone wants to change what I have created. Or worse yet, the ad is never run or the direct mail package is never sent out.
I created one ad for a very dull product that was a miserable failure. But even though no one wanted that product, the client told me he got more spin-off business from that ad than from anything run previously.

Can I Create A Winner For You?

One thing’s for sure, it won’t cost you much to find out. All you have to do is send me a copy of your best ad. Or a sample of your top-producing direct mail package. I’ll let you know lickety-split whether I think I can beat it by 10% or more. If you are serious about making more money in the years ahead, you’d be foolish not to take me up on this offer. My methods work like crazy. And this is a risk-free offer. Call or write now.

Sincerely,
Linwood Austin
Direct Marketing
2274 S. 1300 E. Suite G15
Salt Lake City, UT 84016
Phone: (801) 201-9026

CLASSIFIED ADVERTISING SECRETS

Look at this classified ad… after months of zero interest, the ad sold a luxury car the day after publication…

Advertising to Nervous Investors

Check this ad…
The idea behind this ad is… how to make big promises without sounding too over the top.
There is a lot of emotion behind investing.Mostly fear of loss. Yes, of course they want to profit… but
it hurts to lose.
Onward.
Linwood
Monday

.

The IF – THEN approach to advertising

Here is an ad I created for investors… from Vector Vest.

Think And Grow Rich? NO! NO! NO! Instead: MAIL AND GROW RICH.

Dear Friend,

I just shoveled the snow off the walkway for the third time this week. I came in to make some hot chocolate and found a note from my old buddy Ed Russo. He reminded me to tell you this: Mail And Grow Rich.

You see… You can think all you want… but sooner or later you have to ACT on your thoughts.

Years ago I hosted a weekly meeting of “get-ahead” friends who would read and discussed Napoleon Hill’s book (Think and Grow Rich). We would read one chapter and discuss it each week. When we ran out of chapters we veered off into other topics.

One night Dave was suppose to lead the group. He forced us to listen to a god-awful tape recording of old Mr Knightingale tell the world “It’s your attitude… you’ve got to have a good attitude”… etc.

At the end of the session… I said “Boys… it’s not in your attitude, it’s in your mail. If you write a killer, pleasant, persuasive letter that makes buyers buy from you (or a web site) then who the hell cares what kind of attitude you have?”

If the letter is charming, convincing, and asked for the order in the right kind of way selling the right product at the right price to the right crowd… have any kind of attitude you want. In fact a good marketing campaign will improve your attitude greatly.

Let’s talk.

Linwood Austin

801-201-9026

PS: If you have a good attitude and you talk to people, you can only talk to 20 people a day… belly button to belly button. But if you have a good piece of mail, you can zip it out to 200,000 people a day. It makes all the difference in the world to your attitude.

139 Marketing Questions Any Serious Marketer MUST Ask.

If you did not make all the money you wanted last year…

These questions could reveal a new plan for big profits this year. Go over these 139 questions and then call me – on my cell. From Linwood Austin Cell: 801-201-9026,yourlinwood@gmail.com

Name: _____________________________________

Company Name: ______________________________
Address: ___________________________________

City, State, Zip: ______________________________
Telephone: _________________________________

FAX: _____________________________________
Owner/President: ____________________________

Ad manager/marketing director: __________________

 

1) What kind of business are you in?

Retail? Mail Order?
Wholesale? Service Business?
Manufacturing? Professional?
Distributorship? Other?

2) Products or services offered: _____
3) Years in business: _____
4) Is your business local, regional, or international? _
5) Branch offices: _____
6) What do you ultimately want out of your business, and how do you plan to get it? _____

General Marketing Information

7) What is your UNIQUE SELLING PROPOSITION (What makes you distinctively and uniquely different from your competitors)?
How did you arrive at it?
9) Price ranges: _____
10) Profit margins: _____
11) What is your annual gross revenue? _____
12) What is your fixed monthly overhead? _____
13) (How much of your overhead depends on volume)? _____
14) Advertising budget for the year: _____
15) Who are your direct competitors? ____
16) What do you offer that they don’t? _____
17) What is their biggest failing? _____
18) What do they offer that you do not? _____
19) How much per year do you spend in:

TV? Radio?
Newspapers? Direct mail?
Telemarketing? Yellow pages?
Trade Shows? Internet Marketing?

20) Briefly describe your marketing program.
Are you using a mix of Direct Marketing, Brand Marketing and Buzz Marketing?
21) How much volume do you do each month (both in dollars and units sold)? _____
22) Do you want more volume or more profit on the same volume? _____
23) How much of your time each month do you devote to marketing? _____
24) Do you test your ads, web sites and other marketing efforts? _____
25) If so, what did your tests tell you that you didn’t know before? ___
26) How do you capture the names, addresses and phone numbers of all your customers and prospects? _
27) What is the current size of your customer list? _____
28) How often do you mail to that list?
29) What is your biggest and best source of new business? _____
30) Does your advertising seek to bring “sales” or “leads”?
31) How big is your prospect universe? (How many potential customers are out there for you right now?)
32) What is your most successful selling effort to date, and why? ___
33) What has been your biggest failure, and why? ___
34) What is your biggest marketing challenge? _____
35) If you had as much money as you wanted, what would you do to improve your product?
36) If you had as much money as you wanted, what would you do to improve your marketing? ___
37) Do you have a marketing plan written out and adhered to? _____
38) Do you have a spreadsheet whereby you can predict the effects of numerous variables on your business?
39) Can you handle a sudden increase in sales (if that’s what you want)?
(Note: Front-end profits are those profits made from first-time contact with customers or prospects. Back-end profits are those made from the 2nd, 3rd, etc. contact or sale.)
40) What percentages, of your profits, are made on the front-end? ____
41) What percentage on the back-end? ____
42) What rented list(s) have been most successful for you so far? _
43) What is your natural sales curve for the year?
Jan Feb Mar Apr May June July Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec
44) What is your selling season, if any? _____
45) Are you selling something you love? _____
46) What do your customers really want? _____
47) Why do they buy from you? _____
48) What is your customer attrition rate? _____
49) Is that normal? _____
50) If it’s too high, what do you think it’s due to? _____
51) If it’s lower than average, why? _____
52) Are your customers direct-responsive? _____
53) What problem does your product or service solve for the customer? __
54) Key BENEFITS to your product/service. Please list at least 6:

1
2
3
4
5
6

55) Please list the PRODUCT POINTS or service facts that make those BENEFITS believable.
56) Are you able to target your market with pin-point accuracy?
57) Do you have a testimonial file of satisfied customers? _____
58) Do you have a system in place for soliciting or capturing testimonials? _____
59) Do you have a system for generating customer referrals? _____
60) Briefly describe the niche you fill in the marketplace. ___
61) Briefly describe the niche you fill in the customer’s mind. ___
62) Do you have endorsements from authorities or famous people?
63) What is your business philosophy in relationship to your customers?
64) What guarantee or warranty have you offered in the past?
65) Do you have a sales force to follow up on leads generated?
66) Do you sell your product/service by itself or in combination with other items?
67) If so, what combinations?

Space Advertising

6 Are your ads working?
69) Do you use direct response advertising?
70) If not, why not?
71) What is your advertising philosophy?
72) Do you create your own advertising or have an agency do it?
73) If you use an agency, are you satisfied with them?
74) Approximately how many ads do you run per month?
75) What is the return on investment for your ads?
76) What is the cost per thousand for your ads?
77) How much do you spend to bring in a new customer?
78) Do you use two-step advertising?
79) How much do you spend to bring in a lead?
80) What’s your conversion ratio?
81) What is your cost per sale?
82) How much does your conversion cost?
83) If you test, what do you test?
Copy ? Media ?
Offer ? List ?
Price? Other ?
Direct Mail
84) How much prospecting mail do you drop each month?
85) Do you use a list broker?
86) What is the cost per thousand for our mailings? _____
87) What is the return on investment for your mailings?
88) Do you create your own direct mail packages or hire an agency or freelance writers?

The Back End

89) What is the “lifetime value” of your typical customer?
90) Do you have your customer list on computer?
91) How often does a typical customer buy from you?
92) Have you ever tried to reactivate your former customers and non-converted prospects?
93) Do you rent you customer and/or prospect lists?
94) In what ways do you try to up-sell and/or cross-sell your customers?
95) Do you make consistent efforts to educate your customers?
96) Do you need to make money on the front end or are you satisfied with only making it on the back end?
97) After the sale, what do you do with the customer?
98) When was the last time you introduced a new product or service to your market (both existing customers and prospects)?
99) Do you do anything at the point of sale to increase the order or add on other products or future products or services?
100) How often do you communicate with your customers?
101) Have you segmented your potential market (as well as your customers) according to the various needs of different groupings of people? __
102) Do you use the “80/20” rule in your marketing (80% of your sales come from 20% of your customers)?
Sales
103) Are your salespeople salaried or commissioned or both?
104) Do you use independent sales reps?
105) Do you work through dealers?
106) Is your customer service prompt and courteous?

107) How long does it take you to fill an order after you receive it?
108) Is “buyer’s remorse” a problem for you?
109) If so, how do you overcome it?
Advanced Marketing Techniques
110) Do you do joint ventures?
111) What have you tried?
112) Did it work?, If not, why not?
113) Have you ever created proprietary concepts or ads or mailing pieces that could be sold or licensed to other businesses outside your marketing area?
115) Have you ever tried to sell these ideas?
116) Do your vendors have a direct financial interest in your growth and ultimate success?
118) Have you ever tried “per-inquiry” advertising (paying per inquiry or sale produced by an ad)? If so, how did it do?
119) Do you use a public relations strategy to complement your marketing?
120) Have you ever tried selling your non-converted prospects to your competitors?
121) Do you ever barter your products, services. or assets with other companies in exchange for their products, services or assets?
122) How do you usually get out of a bind?
123) Do you use bonuses in your sales propositions?
124) Do you use risk-reversal in your basic sales propositions?
125) What kind of guarantee or warranty do you give your customers?
126) Do you buy from your competitors to keep track of what they’re doing right and what they’re doing wrong?
127) Do you provide incentive bonuses to your employees for creating new and better marketing methods for your company?
128) Do you actively pick the brains of experts in your field and other fields related to yours?
129) What restrictions are there on your marketing effort? In other words, what can’t you do even if you wanted to?
130) Have you asked your customers what they want?
131) Have you done a customer survey?
How many sent? __ How many returned?_____
132) Have you done a customer list analysis?
133) Are you charging the right price? (How did you determine your products price)?
134) Does your product move a customer away from a pain emotion or toward a greed emotion?
135) Is your market place growing, shrinking, or staying static?
136) How many employees do you have?
137) Is your product a “brand name”?
138) Is your product technically easy to use?
139) What do you most want to get out of your involvement with Linwood Austin?

Please return this form with 3 or more of your current mailing pieces or other printed sales material. Please note: This information will be kept in strict confidence. I will call for additional information I may need. This is enough to at least begin a strategy.

The Nigerian Scam Letters- What Can You Learn From These Scammers About Marketing

The Nigerian Scam
Direct Mail Letters
Should these letters be included in
Denny Hatch’s Million Dollar Mailings?
What can you learn from these scam artists from one of the most corrupt nations on Earth?

Dear Friend,

Click here to find a few letters- variations on the Nigerian scam theme. I consider them to be excellent examples of good copy writing and marketing. And, although I don’t condone the scam aspect of the letters, I do want to call your attention to the techniques the authors used to soak millions, perhaps billions of dollars from naïve U.S. business men. Several years ago the Wall Street Journal ran a feature length article about this scam and some of the folks taken in by it.

The angle is this: It is a pure 2-step, lead generation letter. It asks that you call or fax or email your intentions to “buy” what they are selling.
Once you contact them and express your willingness to help launder the ill-gotten money, then they invent reason after reason why you should SEND THEM MONEY, “You must register with such and such, the registration fee is $500.” “You must help us bribe one last bank official. He only wants $1000.” And so forth.

One CPA, according to the WSJ article, admitted sending a total of $50,000 to Nigeria before he realized he would never see any money from them. So why do they work? Here are my thoughts about the tactics and strategies of these unique mailings:
1. A Nigerian postmark begs to be opened. (Before it was all email.)
2. A hand addressed envelope has to be opened
3. A letter from a “doctor” or another “official” may help believability.
4. They openly admit they are thieves therefore their message, perhaps, can be believed.
5. They ask you to be confidential about this scam they are inviting you into. This is a very important aspect of selling. They ask the reader into their confidence therefore, they infer this is a limited opportunity. In fact one letter flat out says to say whether or not you’re interested, if not they will feel free to sucker someone else.
6. They tell the story of how they got this money.
7. The telling of the story is vital to nearly every selling effort.
8. They use the “take away” close often, “20 to 40 million is available if we, (you) meet these qualifications…”
9. They suggest they want a long-term relationship with you. More building of confidence
10. They admit they are mere “civil servants” and that is why they need your help in this matter, and so forth

Keep these letters on file to remind yourself that the scam artist and the salesman use many of the same tactics. The difference is one has a promise the other has a product.

These letters are brilliant when viewed analytically. Many, many aspects of good marketing are covered…sentence by sentence.

Don’t be caught by the Nigerian scam. But do acknowledge that your business marketing must do the exact same thing that these letters attempt to do. I.E…
1. Promise big benefits (the exact amount)
2. Build credibility
3. Limit the offer
4. Bring the reader into your confidence
5. Build urgency
6. Express passion
7. Make it easy to respond
8. Show your weakness, admit you need help.

If you need help with your marketing and you have a decent, honest product or service, perhaps I can help you with your marketing.

Pick-up the phone and call me. I’ll ask you about your goals your market, your growth and your limitations. Often the right questions will lead to a breakthrough concept that will pay off royally.

This number rings at my desk: 801-201-9026

Sincerely Yours

Linwood Austin

P.S. Part of the “success” of the Nigerian scam letter was the target marketing. (Note the “president” in each of the envelope address blocks). Little words, little things, can have a “helava” impact. It could be that I can double your response without changing one word of your marketing packet. How? By targeting better. Call me. Targeted lists are “killer”.

P.P.S. One more thought on the power of these scam letters. All to often, the reader “feels” he is smarter than these morons who are nothing more than thieves. And when you think you’re smarter… and you’re too smart to be hoodwinked… you’re in for a surprise. The lesson for your own marketing… reveal your weaknesses. So that… you’re buyer will not feel you’re clever enough to “sell” him. Oh No. You’re trying to get the reader to help you sell him. Think about it.

Test Your Management Knowledge!

Discover the answers to these and even more important management and marketing problems inside…

20 Questions 61 Answers

from Linwood Austin Adman

PoSt CaRd NoTeS

Last Minute Notes On Post Card Marketing.

The sweet secret about post cards… is that it works best when you are offering follow-up information.
There is not enough room on a post card, general speaking to get a sale. You need them to raise their hands asking for more info. Then, send them a package which convinces the reader to buy.

Linwood